oh if only i had beauty in my life. there is nothing here. oh if only i could share. words cannot express, my fingers cannot make music, and i cannot replicate what i see. how long must i wait for peace? god how long is this miserable life? why cant anyone ever understand me? why? why must i hide everything about myself? am i not human? am i not acceptable to society? am i only good as a reject or example of something to be despised? god, its been so long since i last had a valid reason to fucking smile. im so tired of being sarcastic. i want to be real, i want to be honest, i want to have love and be able to love another. but how can anyone love when they have no love? how does a person give what they dont have? i swear it is impossible. there is no grace in this world. there is no love, there is nothing but tears, pain, bloodshed, and violence. only death awaits. may god have mercy on the souls of the condemned, for that includes all of humanity. good-bye.
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